i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
