I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
