let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
