I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
