Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
