I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
