don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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