I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
