4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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