Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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