Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
