Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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