I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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