Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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