I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
