They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
my being single is dangerous.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
