i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
thus making me awesome and them whores
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
