Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
