Are we in a gay sports bar?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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