mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Randomize
