so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
