You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
false alarm. still invincible.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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