we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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