Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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