Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Found the puke drawer
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize
