anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
