Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
