Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
