i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
