Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
they're like a gay fantastic four
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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