He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
