dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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