The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
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