i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
