found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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