I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
