i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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