Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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