Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
