At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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