He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
