no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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