Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
