I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize