so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
