im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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