Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
