Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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