I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
