You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
